Tuesday, March 03, 2015

EVERYTHING THAT MADE YOU...FLASH

We were sitting in the back of the innova, waiting for Dr. Chausalkar, he had asked us to wait for 15 minutes while he set up the morphine drip.  Meenal came and sat down next to your face, and I stayed by your bum!  You always wanted me by your bum, scratching it, itching it, but I digress.  We held you and then Raju took us for a small drive with the dickie open.  You started staring out side, with your face on ally's lap, drooling and breathing real hard.  We both kept petting you, both loved you like no one else.  I can say what I felt for your surpasses what I once felt for my own son.  Ally kept telling you that the pain will go away, that you need to go towards the light, that you should not be afraid because we are both with you.  God bless you flash, I said, and I mean it, because you are a blessing in my life.  So we drove around the corner and you kept looking calmly, I could tell your breathing was labored, before we reached the doctor, with all the petting and all the love around you, with your favorite drive done, you gave up your battle with cancer with a deep last breath you put your head down away from us and closed your eyes and left us in the most magical way.  He's going, she said.  I coundlt believe it, but you were, right in front of us, we could feel you go away so peacefully.  I never thought that death could be so Romantic.

I still remember the day the man brought you home in a box, they had flown you from the south.  That made you hate boxes, bags, suitcases toy cars, anything that reminded you of that box from your first flight.  You always barked, stepping backwards while we all giggled, then you would come around to sniffing the bag and calm down after realizing that it wasn't alive.  We both want to write this today, the day you left us, so that we can remember everything about you.  We don't want such a beautiful memory to wash away with time, we don't want to forget what we feel for you, now, we want the true flashisms, the real stuff.

The first night you slept with me, you peed the mattress I had put down, not showing any love or cuddly affection then, running around helter skelter.  I remember you so well during sids wedding practices waiting outside the hall in GA, putting your nose in between the small crack and smelling whats inside the hall, breathing and sighing that you were not part of the festivities.  And of course the food that was laid out which you couldnt resist.  You used to eat so many of ally's shoes because you had nothing better to chew.  At that time, bones were not allowed in the house.  We tried all sorts of things back then for you to eat.  Stuffing balls with food, trying plastic bones trying everything but that real bone.  So you cheated us by eating ally's shoes and chewing on her heels.

You were loved by ashu, you were adored by sid, I know you tried to hump vidya quite a few times, but you just weren't her type.  And she went for a tall dark and handsome dog anyway!!!  There used to be times when we all had our legs on you while we watched television and you just were happy being around.  When you first entered the room, you always wanted a hand on you, so that your nose suggestively rubbed against the free hand which would ultimately lead to some much needed petting, which almost always ended with scratching your tail.

We used to really try to entertain you, we used to bring so many toys initially, the rope game, which was supposedly good for your neck and back, and when you were successfull in tugging away that rope you used to shake that thing triumphantly like you had just conquered rome.  We tried to train you with vishnu, we took you to the gardens in andheri east on sunday mornings, where you tried to make a new friend in the doberman and she growled at your advances.  You were so good, so obiedient, you never made us feel uncomfortable even though you could have because you were a strong dude.

Flash, we are still trying to clean up the smears from your dirty eyes on all our couches, we are still trying not to look down into the hall and miss you.  We are waiting for you to walk into my room, walk on the wooden flooring and disturb us all night! and then walk out to the top floor when you are done being around us.  We miss you my baccha, we miss you every time we enter the house.  Somehow you always knew when I was going be home, you knew and you welcomed me home with love and affection every day.  I cant thank you enough for that.  I wish I was a better person, I wish I wasnt so lazy I wish we had done more things together, it seems 10 years passed us by too fast.  I just couldnt let you know how much I loved you.

I remember our times in bhandardara, how could anyone forget the farts that you laid out on us on our way back.  You really enjoyed those trips, it was cool, the grass was green and there were no kids around it was just the three of us.  We tried to play catch with you, but you wouldnt bother, you wanted to explore, you wanted to walk in the open and you did.  The only thing that got your attention then, was the scream by ally "Oye", you would tuck your nonexistant tail between your legs and look down and reluctantly walk towards her to get her finger on your nose.  I remember the time when we all ate together at bhandardhara, outside under the stars while you groaned about not getting any food from our table. I remember distinctly the way you walked over the bridge over water because you were such a phattu!  I remember when ashu came home one night, while both of us slept in my old room in GA.  As soon as the kalu walked in, you started barking so loudly and ran away from him, I woke up and got scared too!!! But you were more scared than me.  You never barked at any person who came home, you never made anyone feel threatened, you always welcomed people, by rolling over and asking to be pet on your tummy, you were just one of a kind.

We want to feel that we were the biggest and most important part of your life, but we weren't there was always something bigger, better for you and it was something that made you leave us everyday and run up to the kitchen, the reason that the kitchen became your true home, and it was all because of your true love of food.  You were a perpetual bhukka!  You just needed someone to walk past you carrying a tray and your deep sleep would evaporate at the thought of getting something in that tummy of yours.  The baby faces, and the cries for some meat, while me and ally ate in the den...the drool pool from the staircase landing, we were always wondering how that wet drool reached us on our couch! you were really struggling to get close and smell the food!
We remember so many times after parties you would get into submarine mode, and seach the house for left overs, some plates, lying around so you could jump up and grab your share.  Leaving food unattended around you was like an invitation for you to steal, and gobble up.  We remember the time you finished 15 kgs of dog food because we left it unattended and accessable to you, and when we caught you in the morning, you were unable to eat anymore, but protecting the last few crumbs with your life.  You always used to get so possesive about the white bone, often storing it for days so that you could come back to eat it.

We used to feed you water from the bathroom douche, and you used to lick the water off my hand, thats how you liked your water.  Ally used to love washing you, cleaning you, drying you, using hair spa conditioning you for a good smell which lasted all of two hours.  She took so much care of your ears, your bum, you legs, nails never allowed you to look unclean!  And till the last day!  She misses you right now, I can tell.  We both do!

My heart hurts right now so much, we have cried all day today, we lost you today and I cant bear to feel like this again.  So I told her, I dont want a second pet ever, I dont want anyone to replace my memory of you.  I dont want to forget, and thats all I come back to.  How can I make you immortal on print, through pictures or videos, but I cant, I will always miss you by buddy. My best friend, my soulful pal, my crazy flash.



Why did you have to bite vaziranis dog!  And not only bite, almost kill him!  you crazy dude.  Although that started a new chapter in your life.  Vasai...I made a home for you, with brick and mortar, you used to like staying there. I hope, I hated leaving you in the evenings.  I hope you had a great adventure there, I hope you were able to see the mountain in the backside, sit within the shade of the trees and enjoy the time between you me and your new bestie ramchandra.  He was good to you, but raju was great to you,  Chotu misses you too, he too was crying his eyes out today.  I hope you remember the snakes we saw toghether in the jungle, I hope you remember the soccer game with you, me and ramchander, I hope you remember the trips to the beach with raju, I hope you remember jumping in the sea water.

And man you ran well, we loved playing with you in the garden, only to see your ears fly in the air as you jumped. We loved looking at you jump and run coz you were our baby!  You are our baby!  And you always will be!
 





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